Empathy
Contributed by Stephen Wickman, St. Thomas Episcopal, McLean
“Why Have Empathy for Those Who Never Extend It?” is how Qasim Rashid begins a brave essay that reflects on the death of Charlie Kirk Reflections on the Death of Charlie Kirk. It is well worth the time to read his thoughts in full, but here is a summary:
Rashid argues that Kirk rarely extended empathy and often poured contempt on many groups of Americans, including Muslims, engendering hatred.
And he returns to a verse from the Qur’an for guidance:
“O ye who believe! be steadfast in the cause of God, bearing witness in equity; and let not a people’s enmity incite you to act otherwise than with justice. Be always just, that is nearer to righteousness. And fear God. Surely, God is aware of what you do.” — Chapter 5, Verse 9
Rashid detests and works ferociously to counter what he views as the hatred that Kirk engendered but at the same time does not allow these injustices to make him retaliate in kind. As he puts it: “I will not allow his fear of the other infect my ability to see the humanity in every person.”
And here is an important comment from the niece of Rev. Martin Luther King:
‘And now while his family and this nation grieve, some are calling him a racist. A white supremacist. Even a fake Christian. Such accusations are conversations unbecoming to a Christian,” she continued. “In the final analysis, Charlie stood for life, for faith, and biblical truth. He wasn’t afraid to say the name of Jesus in the public square, and he paid a price for it. Now is not the time to attack Charlie. It’s the time to lift up the banner of Christ as the member of the one blood human race Charlie Kirk did. His legacy of public discourse of bringing difficult conversations to the table mattered. He caused us to think and to pray. Charlie has gone to meet his maker. May he rest in peace. May we honor him today by praying for his family and by answering this question: Where will you spend eternity?’
“Such empathy or hard “love” is a basic premise of all our faith traditions. I disagree with Kirk on most things, but especially on his treatment of the LGBTQ community, Muslims and “progressives,” but like Rashid’s, my faith requires me to respond with kindness even as I express my disagreement.
In the Book of Common Prayer of the Episcopal Church, there is a prayer for one’s “enemies” that carefully balances responsibility on both sides of a conflict:
“O God, the Father of all, whose Son commanded us to love
our enemies: Lead them and us from prejudice to truth:
deliver them and us from hatred, cruelty, and revenge; and in
your good time enable us all to stand reconciled before you,
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.”
In that spirit and in the spirit of Islam and other faith traditions, let us extend our empathy and love, without prejudice, to the Kirk family and his supporters.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Susan Posey, Redeemer Lutheran Church, McLean
A friend of mine recently shared a link to an article published in Time entitled, We All Deserve Dignity and Respect. It is authored by Russell Nelson, the President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints on the occasion of his 101st birthday! Mr. Nelson’s observations are his gift to us, and I for one, found them to be very encouraging.
Here are a few snippets:
“The world has changed dramatically. Yet what I have learned is that some truths do not change. These enduring truths are what anchor us in turbulent times.”
On the occasion of my 101st birthday, I wish to share two such truths – lessons that I believe contribute to lasting happiness and peace.
First: Each of us has inherent worth and dignity. I believe we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father. But no matter your religion or spirituality, recognizing the underlying truth beneath this belief that we all deserve dignity is liberating – it brings emotional, mental, and spiritual equilibrium – and the more you embrace it, the more your anxiety and fear about the future will decrease.
Second: Love your neighbor and treat them with compassion and respect. A century of experience has taught me this certainty: anger never persuades, hostility never heals, and contention never leads to lasting solutions.”
Regardless of your religious or spiritual practice, I think there is much wonderful food for thought in this article, the full text of which can be found here.
Happy Birthday, Mr. Nelson, and thank you for sharing your wisdom with us.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Stephen Wickman, St. Thomas Episcopal, McLean
This Sunday morning while walking my son’s ever-curious dog along the well-lit, beautifully engineered Vesper St. trail, which connects Route 7 and the toney suburbs of Vienna, I was not surprised to see an “unhoused” man, who quickly turned off his flashlight as we ambled past the path that enters the Tysons Forest to the east. Frankly, though I had seen unhoused individuals in Tysons, principally around the entrances to our new Silver Line Metro stops, I was somewhat astonished that no one had found the beautiful natural areas of our neighborhood.
After walking around almost every part of the Tysons area, with and without the dog, I could draw a map of areas that are amenable to hosting the unhoused, particularly when the weather is warm. I do not know if this individual was pushed out of Washington, D.C. by the National Guard and federalized police now clearing the encampments downtown (I was not going to interview him, especially since he discreetly turned off his light).
The irony is that this man was camped out in the shadow of the Amazon-financed affordable housing high rise, a stone’s throw from the Porsche and Land Rover dealership, and in sniffing distance of my 20-dollar cigar. The new housing complex, while commendable, will never accommodate this individual, who I dare conjecture brings in nothing like the 60% of “average median income” needed to qualify for the new apartments.
Also of note, the Tysons Forest has been home to the unhoused since the Paleolithic Era. During a cleanup of this beautiful watershed, a Park Authority expert showed us where he had found the makings of flints by human beings who lived here long before the Native Americans, White Europeans and freed slaves inhabited it. Yes, Tysons as you will see in an earlier blog post, was home to a community of freed slaves – notably Alfred Odrick, whose White Virginian master freed him after purchasing him and bringing him here from Haiti. ( Odricks Corner, Virginia – Wikipedia)
We at Tysons Interfaith are working with the Tysons Community Alliance (TCA) and the county to find a site for a meditation garden, most likely in the Tysons Forest. It would be fitting to honor Odrick and his predecessors with a sign or some sculpture. It would be even better if we could find a way to house this newcomer.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Andra Baylus, Regional Director of the Meher Baba Spiritual Community
Carrying out protecting citizens and the many variations of being a citizen, which includes people of different faith traditions, cultures, the wealthy, the poor, the middle class, the homeless and the immigrants, should be done carefully and respectfully taking into consideration each individual’s circumstances, thus ~ judiciously.
This is what America is all about.
When issues are raised of crime being rampant in DC and people not feeling safe to attend their houses of worship at night or people “disappearing” who are citizens and have not committed any crime, then of course, it is an invitation for action of some kind to take place to remedy these valid concerns. The questions then would be, “What kind of action is needed?” and, “How best can these actions be fairly implemented?”.
Not to act would be an abdication of governmental responsibility to protect its citizens, however, rounding up people indiscriminately may not be the wisest way to go about protecting the citizens of DC.
Muhammad (May blessings and peace be upon him- bpbuh) often spoke about the ” middle path”. He also was thought to have said that, “One hour of reflection is worth 70 years of prayer.”.
Would it be possible to follow the ” middle path” suggested by Muhammad (bpbuh) and pause to reflect upon how best to proceed?
Speaking to people who have experience in these areas of concern to seek their guidance would tap their knowledge and experience and help guide and refine actions to be not only fair to all citizens, but also effective. The importance and value of knowledge is firmly rooted in Islamic teachings. There are authentic Hadith that emphasize the obligation of seeking knowledge, such as: ” Seeking knowledge is obligatory upon every Muslim.”
“Seek knowledge even if you have to go as far as China” is a widely known saying attributed to the Prophet Muhammad (bpbuh), however, its authenticity as a hadith is debated among scholars. Many Muslims interpret this as a figurative expression emphasizing the importance of seeking knowledge diligently even if it requires traveling to the ends of the Earth.
Why not then seek advice about the issues of crime from professionals and before stepping forward to do something, is it possible to pause, do “due diligence”, inquire, reflect and use discernment to gauge the proper course of action.
All of our many faith traditions have wisdom embedded in our respective holy books and writings, as referenced above regarding Islamic texts. In today’s world, surely this guidance is more important than ever before.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Rev. Dr. Trish Hall
We have, in plain sight, an opportunity to create a world that works – a world that supports itself by connecting and nurturing all aspects of creation. The common phrase “hidden in plain sight” applies to much of our human experience. Life in all its messy diversity is blatantly in front of and all around us. We are immersed in it. We can pretend that it is not, and such pretense will only cause greater and greater rifts.
The idiom “hidden in plain sight” used by Edgar Allen Poe in his short story, “The Purloined Letter,” demonstrates the limits of human perception and the importance of observation, suggesting that something can be both conspicuous and inconspicuous at the same time.
Buddhism addresses the concept of “hidden in plain sight” by suggesting that the path to awakening is not about seeking something external or extraordinary, but about recognizing the truth that is already present in our experience.
Christianity guides followers to see the “hidden things of God” that are hidden in plain sight for those who have opened their eyes to see and their ears to listen.
Similarly, we often miss opportunities, such as the possibility of changing the whole world, because we go through life so preoccupied with routine activities. We miss the richness that is constantly presented to us. The admonition, “slow down and smell the roses,” advises us to take respites from our busyness to appreciate what is right in front of us.
Within current times that are often described as “tumultuous,” some of us withdraw into our personal cocoons, isolating from others, resulting in loneliness. Alternatively, we join communities with which we have a lot in common, and which exclude people unlike ourselves. To insulate from perceived dangers, these groups can take on the nature of gangs clustering together against assumed enemies.
With either approach, barriers emerge that block our ability to connect with the richness of Creation. The sense of separation – separateness –arises as fear and loneliness. Loneliness has been labeled a pervasive epidemic. Whether individuals isolate or withdraw into the assumed safety of cultural/community bounds, a shared fixation on contrast and differences, causes “othering.” Hostility and aggression ensue, and the chasms between peoples grow.
The opportunity presenting itself “in plain sight” is to become cultural connectors – bridge builders.
Creation is immeasurably diverse. Whether you count insects, reptiles, birds or mammals including humans there are myriad individuations – each unique – each one-of-a-kind! When we hide among those with whom we have an affinity, a resemblance or cultural connection, we rob ourselves of the opportunity to experience the richness of the creation.
Cultural blindness refers to the lack of awareness and understanding of cultural differences, often leading to the imposition of one’s own cultural values on others. It’s a state of being unaware of, or actively ignoring, the diverse cultural backgrounds, beliefs, and practices present within a group or society.
The practices of ignoring and/or othering are, unfortunately, exceedingly common. If we ignore those who are different from us, not only are we denying them recognition, we deprive ourselves of opportunities to learn and connect. If we engage in othering – labeling – we are judging, devaluing and relegating them to something unacceptable. We are separating them from us. We are denigrating and discarding them. Who are we to judge others based on our assumptions?
Whether you consider yourself a humanist, deeply religious or somewhere in the middle, it makes sense to interact with everyone and everything for the betterment of all. Inclinations to divide stem from fear based on biases, preconceived notions, or a lack of critical thinking.
I am inviting you to consider enhancing how you see the world. Even if you already embrace the concept of oneness (not to be confused with “sameness”), hidden biases probably are lurking within you. The way we humans learn is to observe, compare and store all our experiences. The moment we compare we are filtering our observations. That filtering function is the imposition of unconscious biases. Unless such biases are addressed at the conscious level, they alter perceptions like bugs in software that can cripple our operating systems. Although people often assert, “I’m not biased,” their internal controller adds: “provided people live their lives within my comfort zone.”
Does your heart yearn for a world composed of individuals, families, neighborhoods, cultures and communities living together in peace? Mine does. John Lennon’s song, “Imagine,” immediately comes to mind.
Wayne Dyer taught, “When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change.” Life is composed of myriad cultures so cultural differences are ubiquitous. You may encounter communication disconnects within your own family, neighbors, religions, partisan perspectives, ethnicities or internationally. It’s important to acknowledge that gaps exist everywhere and all too often within our closest relationships. Many disconnects have taken on proportions that seem wider than the Great Rift Valley in Kenya.
When we shift how we see our world, we shift the world – we radically change relationships: interpersonal, interfaith, intercultural and international.
A Colleague stated, “How you see them is how you serve them.” How we see each person in our lives impacts how we relate to/with them!!
The opportunity to change the whole world by shifting how we relate to our fellow humans and all creation, is right in front of us, in plain sight.
Cultural diversity abounds around us. We get to be trail blazers changing the world by starting conversations even when we feel scared and especially when we feel unsure about whether our presence will be welcomed. Actually, our internal dialogue is a bold indicator that a situation is the perfect one to enter.
To foster and strengthen healthy intercultural connections requires that we step out of our own comfort zone to offer new ways of connecting. Such an approach requires sensitivity to bridge the gaps.
It doesn’t matter what your color, geography, ethnicity, nationality, gender identity, age, station, economic/community, or any other way in which you identify yourself, everyone is different!
Bridging such divides requires that we enter our pursuit with compassion, gently gleaning a sense of how it is to be someone. The task is huge and complex.
It requires commitment, determination, kindness and compassionate perseverance. The process requires delicacy and loving boldness.
The components are surprisingly simple. The application of those components can be challenging. The arena in which we need to apply those components is fragile. The essential element is trust undergirded by Love. Trying to reassemble trust, if broken, is much like trying to put Humpty-Dumpty together again, so let’s avoid breaking trust.
To build a bridge, we must assess the current situation:
- What are we moving from? Feeling discontent
- What are we spanning? Perceived differences/separation
- What is our desired outcome? Supportive interconnection
Peace and equity will only come to pass when we learn from and with people of other perspectives.
Together, we get to be bridge builders – to be initiators. Now is the perfect time to establish new patterns and new ways of relating – to embrace oneness boldly so that an observer would never doubt our belief in it nor our commitment to create a world that works for all.
Like love, our embrace of oneness cannot be conditional. It cannot depend on our comfort. Knowing that, as cultural connectors, we are facilitating the emergence of a world that works – a world that supports itself by connecting and nurturing all aspects of creation.
Engage in “witness consciousness” – observe yourself and others without forming opinions and jumping to conclusions. Not easy yet incredibly rewarding!
Embrace “beginner mind” and open to how it is to be someone of another culture or perception. Be flexible and adaptable. Identify shared values and common concerns. Open to possibility.
Encourage others to join you by creating a tsunami of connections. Barge out of your comfort zone. Accept that any stories you are carrying about other cultures are rooted beneath your conscious awareness, so you need to consciously release the hold they may have on you.
Now is the perfect time to embrace that YOU are a Cultural Connector – a transformative force in the universe creating a world that works for all.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Susan Posey: Lutheran Church of the Redeemer, McLean
A friend of mine recently brought to my attention an initiative taken by the Muslim and Jewish Communities in Manchester, England this summer.
Concerned about the rise in hate incidents against both Muslims and Jews in the UK and in the world, and acknowledging that, “(t)he conflict in Israel and Gaza continues to be a source of distress and despair,” leaders from the Greater Manchester Jewish and Muslim communities met for months at meetings chaired by the President and Vice-Chancellor of the University of Manchester.
These meetings, “…. allowed for honest and forthright opinions to be shared which in turn led to the building of mutual trust and a commitment to ensure foreign conflicts do not become an instrument of division within our diverse communities of Greater Manchester.”
The end result was the signing of a Declaration on July 28, 2025, that commits all parties to continuing honest and respectful dialogue. The Declaration reads in part:
“These conversations will not and cannot be expected to resolve, for example, the issue of borders, the status of Jerusalem etc. but will be about accepting that both communities have a right to hold strong views and opinions which need to be respected alongside the willingness to sit down and listen to each other’s views. If we can collectively agree on just this principle then, if nothing else, we are confident that we can begin to help reduce anti- Muslim and antisemitic hate incidents/ and crimes in our city region.”
I was encouraged by the steps taken by faith leaders in Greater Manchester and hope their actions can be emulated both here in the US and abroad.
The text of this Declaration in its entirety can be found: HERE.
As an interfaith community, Tyson’s Interfaith celebrates diversity of thought, cultures, and religious practices. We uphold the principle of the “Oneness of Humanity” which recognizes the value and inherent worth of every human life and our interconnectedness. An injury inflicted on a person anywhere in the world is an injury to us all. We pray for healing in this, our beloved world. We commit ourselves to promoting love, understanding and mutual respect among neighbors – for we are all neighbors.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Stephen Wickman, St. Thomas Episcopal, McLean
When you travel this great country by car – and yes, IMHO, it’s already great – and stay in motels, getting up in the middle of the night to view the deer and the tall cornfields and meet others who are nocturnally inclined, you realize just how wonderful, inquisitive, diverse, and caring are your fellow Americans and other fellow creatures. And when you are retired in a sort of semi-permanent “staycation,” it’s invigorating to get out of town like we did last week, when I ferried my wife and Brooklyn-resident daughter to my sister-in-law’s place just outside of Asheville, NC in Weaverville. They went on to the John Campbell Folk School JCCFS | John C. Campbell Folk School while I, having nothing better to do, spent a week at the Swannanoa Gathering at Warren Wilson College for “Old Time Week,” their most popular event. Old-Time Week – Swannanoa Gathering They studied respectively, tapestry making, yarn dying, and making animals out of found objects. I sang, learning shape-note singing, unaccompanied Appalachian ballads, and singing in tight Southern harmony.
My shape-note teacher, a fellow “Whiskeypalian,” as he liked to dub our Christian denomination, was a walking, talking encyclopedia from Kentucky. And I have never seen so many fiddlers gathered in one place, along with guitarists, banjo players, dulcimer hammerers, mandolinists, bassists, cloggers, square dancers, concertina artists, and folks who played instruments I’d never seen before. The guest artists who guided us in the pavilion after lunch included a young Cherokee flautist from Cherokee, North Carolina. A banker by day, he spent his leisure hours keeping alive a musical tradition born on this sacred ground long before the settlers came. (When he played, he said it was okay to fall asleep, since he sometimes did while he was performing!) Their dance traditions, which mimicked the native animals they cherished, influenced the dance moves of the incoming settlers. Even as almost all of the Cherokee were “removed” to Oklahoma, the remaining natives somehow kept their traditions alive.
And there was the best fiddler I have ever heard, who hailed from Galax in Southwest Virginia, where country music was born, and where my son spent one high school Summer in the eye-popping Virginia Conservation Corps. Without getting too political, it is interesting to note that Galax is the only “blue” area in a sea of “red.” (There must be an interesting story there.)
Warren Wilson never set foot in North Carolina, but he was the most productive and progressive Presbyterian you could ever imagine. The college named after him started as a farm school for boys over a hundred years ago, and the 800 or so students who attend there still work the same farm as they study the arts, sciences, and humanities.
Needless to say, I came back to McLean “revived.” The highlight was on Saturday, when a local shape-note club that piggy-backs on the annual gathering brought their covered dishes to the pavilion and serenaded the bear that roam freely on campus. Our leader told us that one year a large bear emerged from the trees to sniff the dishes laid out on a table in the pavilion only to turn and walk up the steps to the dorms. He apparently respected the singing.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Lois Herr: First Church of Christ, Scientist, McLean
Many people set aside time in their day for prayer, reflection, or meditation. As a Christian Science practitioner, I often find inspiration in daily audio reflections presented by members of our church, called the Daily Lift.
A recent Daily Lift by Madelon Maupin, from Scottsdale, Arizona, is entitled, “The antidote to extremism.” In this segment, Madelon explains how she has come to use Jesus’s Sermon on the Mount – specifically, the Beatitudes as a way to think and pray about countering extremism. In her remarks, Madelon reminds us, “We all live at the same address and it is called the kingdom of God,” which offers mercy, healing and love.
The Daily Lift is comprised of audio presentations contributed by Christian Science church members worldwide – with the majority coming from the U.S. This particular Lift will remain on the website for thirty days before being retired.
May this segment bring you peace and encouragement.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Stephen Wickman, St. Thomas Episcopal, McLean
The Jewish festival of Shavuot, occurred June 1-3. According to Rabbinic tradition, this celebration marks the revelation of the Ten Commandments to Moses and the Israelites at Mount Sinai.
Amidst the ongoing violence in Ukraine, Gaza, Sudan, Cameroon, and anti-Jewish attacks and other religious-based assaults against peace-loving civilians in the United States and elsewhere, let’s listen to the thoughts of Rabbi Jonathan Wittenberg, who shared this recording on the BBC recently.
“’I’m your God, don’t abuse me or one another.’ I hear these words with sorrow and shame but also hope. I’m horrified by how we hurt each other, the wars, the cruelty and hunger, yet the world remains intricately and inspiringly beautiful. That’s why I cling to the deeply imaginative interpretation rooted in Jewish mystical thought by the rabbi of Ger, a popular Hasidic teacher who died in 1905.
When God said, I am your God, every creature experienced those words as spoken directly to them. For an instant, every living being, humans, donkeys, birds, understood that their deepest nature, their innermost spirit, comes from and belongs to God. They heard those words, I am your God, not just from the mountaintop but from inside their hearts. Afterwards, everything returned to normal, each human and animal to its separate consciousness, its own reality, in this material world which conceals from us the deepest truth of who we are. But in that moment, we understood that one life, one consciousness, fills us all and that something sacred, something deeper than all divisions, unites us.
For that brief interval, said the rabbi, we were incapable of harming one another. This was long ago, but he maintained, if we listen deeply, we can still catch the after-echo of God’s voice in all creation. If we could be attentive to that voice in our fellow humans and in all life, we would instinctively hold back and, in Isaiah’s words, not cruelly hurt or destroy any living being, but instead do our utmost to bring healing to our world. Maybe it’s that after echo we hear when, in a heartfelt conversation, we reach a pause and sit silently together, knowing that something words can’t reach has touched us.”
Our Rector, the Rev. Fran Gardner-Smith on Easter Sunday used a similar metaphor: we are the after-image of God’s photograph, taken at the time of creation, like the image on your retina after a photograph. And yesterday, on Ascencion Day in the Christian tradition, our parish administrator added in his sermon, quoting the Book of Revelation: we are a “pre-image” of heaven on earth, a shining city.
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.
Contributed by Stephen Wickman, St. Thomas Episcopal, McLean
In 2003, Robert Waldinger, a psychoanalyst who would later become an ordained Zen Buddhist priest and who had always been preoccupied by questions “with an existential flavor” accepted an offer from Harvard (I know) to take on one of its most prized possessions, the longest-running wellness study in American history. A dozen years later he reported his findings in a TED Talk. “The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.” Not achievement, not fortune nor fame, but strong, long-term relationships with spouses, family and friends built on deep trust — that’s the best predictor of well-being. Waldinger had worried that this big “news” was so intuitive he would be laughed off the stage; instead, the talk is one of TED’s most watched to date, having over 27 million views.
In 2001, when the men in the long-term study were in their late 70s and early 80s, Waldinger’s predecessor had found one of the best predictors of the men’s overall well-being in their old age was how happily married they had been at age 50. When women were added to the study, the results were the same. One 80-year-old woman told an interviewer she wished she had spent less time getting upset about “silly things” and had spent more “time with my children, husband, mother, father.” For those who reported being in happy marriages, socializing with others in the spouse’s circle also contributed to their happiness. But if one spouse fell into pain or ill health, time spent together alone seemed to protect them from the psychological effects of the physical suffering. He also found that the people who scored highest on measures of attachment to their spouses were also the ones who reported the highest levels of happiness.
Well, so much for modern science, and Harvard! All the religions of the world have been preaching this forever, though few of our ancient forebears reached their 70s or 80s!
This blog post is the expressed opinion of its writer and does not necessarily reflect the views of Tysons Interfaith or its members.